How to Disagree with Someone More Powerful than You
Topic: Business Etiquette
Skills: Business English, Reading, Writing, Vocabulary Expansion & Critical Thinking
English Level: B2 or Higher
Instructions:
Read and answer the questions below.
Be sure to highlight and take note of any new vocabulary words, interesting phrases, and expressions.
Disagreeing with a boss or superior at work isn’t easy, but it’s a problem we all come across from time to time. This activity is designed to get you thinking about how you would approach and plan for this kind of scenario in the workplace.
A) After this risk assessment, you may decide it’s best to hold off on voicing your opinion. Maybe “you haven’t finished thinking the problem through, the whole discussion was a surprise to you, or you want to get a clearer sense of what the group thinks,” says Weeks. “If you think other people are going to disagree too, you might want to gather your army first. People can contribute experience or information to your thinking — all the things that would make the disagreement stronger or more valid.” It’s also a good idea to delay the conversation if you’re in a meeting or other public space. Discussing the issue in private will make the powerful person feel less threatened.
When thinking about confronting someone at work, why is it a good idea to wait?
B) When you move on to expressing your concerns, watch your language carefully. Grenny says to avoid any “judgment words” such as “short-sighted,” “foolish,” or “hasty” that might set off your counterpart; one of his tips is to cut out all adjectives, since “they have the potential to be misinterpreted or taken personally.” Share only facts. For example, instead of saying, “I think that first-quarter deadline is naïve,” you can say, “We’ve tried four projects like this in the past, and we were able to do two in a similar time period, but those were special circumstances.” Weeks also recommends staying neutral and focused: “Lay off the players and be vivid about the problem. Try to make it an honest disagreement, a worthwhile advancement of thought.”
What phrases can you use to avoid your superior becoming defensive?
How can you stay neutral during the discussion?
What are some words you should avoid? Give 3 examples.
C) Before you share your thoughts, think about what the powerful person cares about — it may be “the credibility of their team or getting a project done on time,” says Grenny. You’re more likely to be heard if you can connect your disagreement to a “higher purpose.” When you do speak up, don’t assume the link will be clear. You’ll want to state it overtly, contextualizing your statements so that you’re seen not as a disagreeable underling but as a colleague who’s trying to advance a shared goal. The discussion will then become “more like a chess game than a boxing match,” says Weeks.
Why is it important to identify a shared goal?
D) Put the following steps in order of importance to you. In one paragraph, explain your reasoning.
Don’t make judgments
Stay calm
Identify a shared goal
Validate the original point
Acknowledge their authority
Ask permission to disagree
Decide whether to wait
Stay humble
E) Read the scenario below. Decide what to say, how to say it, and how you will carry yourself constructively and more confidently in your approach to disagreeing with this person. Refer to your steps in question 6 to help you organize your approach to handling this situation.
Your boss expects you to drop everything to complete a project with an impossible turnaround time. When you try to speak up about it in a meeting, they refuse to listen or take it as you not understanding the urgency of the issue. However, it’s not that the urgency isn’t understood, it’s that the deadline is impossible and the team is set up for failure. As such, you expect that your team will be forced to produce less than quality work and abandon processes to complete this new task.
Click the link below to read the full article. https://hbr.org/2016/03/how-to-disagree-with-someone-more-powerful-than-you
